@sbellelauren: thank god 50 shades of grey got the R rating they wanted because what kid under 18 wouldn't want to watch 50 shades of grey with a parent
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@wickedsuga: Randomly play a recording of a candy bar wrapper being opened just to keep your kids on their toes.
@leslid79: I wish there was a show called "Lifestyles of the Twitter Famous" so we could all see how nice your mom's basement is.
@JohnLyonTweets: Me: Can I have a gin and tonic? Them: Sir, this is an elementary school party. Me: Fine. MAY I have a gin and tonic?