@TheDizzyBeauty: Thank God for semi colon's. How would I have ever been able to flirt if they didn't exist?
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@carlyken: My favorite part of football is when players "look to God." Because He's all, "I can't do shit for the Middle East but I'm rooting for YOU."
@SF_incognito: You (normal person, can make small talk): I like your name Me (awkward af, says stupid shit constantly): thanks it was a birthday present