@Ramitology: Thank God you've updated your status to "Finished lunch" after you first posted "Going to lunch" I really couldn't tolerate more suspense.
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@tastefactory: I accidentally touched the underside of a public toilet seat with my finger. Well, you had a good run, finger. *chainsaw sound*
@MrSandeepP: I love how girls say that they like a guy with a sense of humour and yet you'll never find a poster of Mr Bean on their wall.
@GrantTanaka: We should probably abolish the death penalty since we don't even get to throw rotten vegetables at people anymore