@simoncholland: Thanks for always acting surprised by breakfast in bed like you slept right through the great pots and pans avalanche of 6:45 AM.
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@iamjeffsloan: Still super weird to me that humans can make other smaller humans. I wish mozzarella sticks could make other smaller mozzarella sticks.
@StarWarsProblms: Obi-wan: You don’t have a shot with Padmé. Anakin: Don’t underestimate my charm. *stares at her creepily for the rest of the movie*
@MunkMania: 3: Who's that on your shirt? Me: Yoda, from Star Wars. 3: I don't like him. Me: YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@novicefather: A breakfast buffet at my funeral so people will be happy. But with soy bacon and chia seed pancakes so they know it's a time to grieve.