@SamuelHLowe: That awkward moment when someone is washing dishes and you slowly put your glass in the sink.
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@iamMunga: Too many kids crying. I'm never having kids.I'm just gonna adopt an adult who has a job already.
@Donna_McCoy: Autocorrect just changed faux pas to faux pasta and this gluten war has gotten out of hand.
@Laser_Cat: A fun prank to pull on a neighbor is to introduce a species of invasive grass into his lawn.
@IvoryGazelle: Years ago I was able to find the trashcan in a friend's kitchen on the first try, and I've been riding that high ever since