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@itweetmaya: That awkward moment when the garbage goes out more than you.
@cornlog: My son is screaming his head off in his room but there's no way I'm going in there if his monster reports are true.
@remmarg_yelsel: With Instagram's new video function, we will now be able to hear the quacks from all the duck faces.
@Cheeseboy22: Just ate an order of cheese fries and smoke started coming out of my Fitbit.
@chelliet22: Absence does not make the heart grow fonder.
Unless you're talking about Oreos.
@2HighBros: be smart 😌