@SkinnerSteven: That old expression: "hold the phone!" doesn't work anymore because everyone is already doing that
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@SodomyClown: I don't know what it means to "find your better half" but I hope my better half is a robot so that I can be half human half robot.
@internetluke: *gets on 1 knee* Jenny... "OMG" *places hand on heart and starts crying* "This is great!" *gets on 2nd knee* I'm having a heart attack
@farleftcoast: A jogger just yelled at me for accidentally blowing pot smoke in his face. So I yelled at him for making me feel fat.