@TheDreamGhoul: The 9th rule of fight club is no roller skates. honestly guys I don't know why we keep having to say this.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@sofarrsogud: *maintains eye contact while checking 'Dating Librarians For Dummies' out from the library.
@iwearaonesie: me[holding wife's shirt] Can this go in the dryer? wife:What does it say on the tag? me:Gap wife:The other tag me:Oh wife me:Made in Vietnam
@andylassner: Never trust anyone who says you need to come out of your shell because let's start with the fact that they think you're a turtle
@krisv_723: Everyone on FB is posting the status- I voted. I guess it's truthful Tuesday so I posted- I once killed a hobo & hid his body in a barrel.