@ilovepie84: The best way to see if someone is telling the truth is to tie them to a chair and start up the ol chainsaw.
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@danabrit: I'm writing code, not making diamonds. Continuing to apply more and more pressure will not produce a better outcome.
@Ideal_Victoria: Ok, seriously men... You can't hear yourselves snoring, but the slightest crinkle of a chip bag, and you're suddenly wide awake?!
@FattMernandez: When I go to Burger King, I like to get a Whopper and a Whopper jr. then make the Whopper watch as I eat the Whopper jr.
@WheelTod: Cinderella & Clark Kent would be a fun couple. Any time she took off her shoe or he took off his glasses, it'd be: "Who the hell are you?!"