@vornietom: The classiest Minion is called a Filet Minion please fave and RT
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@KentWGraham: If you wear a Bluetooth phone piece in your ear, you can say “You’re an idiot” to just about anyone you walk past.
@ColoChiver: Scared the mailman today by going to the door completely naked. Not sure what scared him more, my naked body or that I knew where he lived.
@jazmasta: *hairstylist holds mirror behind my head after styling my hair* "Is that ok for you sir?" "Yes that is a beautiful mirror. I'll take it"