@brendohare: The doctors all doubted me. They all thought I couldn't do it. They said I couldn't fight them all at once and well, they were 100% right
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@OreoSpeedwagon_: I'm like a Ferrero Rocher in that I'm quite nutty and go down nicely with wine. I also come in family size.
@TheTobbie: Is it racist that I've been talking to this one white chick on my street for months now & just realized she's actually 5 white chicks?...
@WilliamAder: Read the tweet above this one and then the tweet below it. People paid FORTY-FIVE DOLLARS PER SHARE FOR THIS.