@TheAlexNevil: The Exorcist (1973): a child is possessed by a demon. Hilarity ensues.
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@jordan_stratton: [job interview] Look. First, you give me a job. Then I get paid. THEN I'll be able to buy pants. I can't just skip ahead to the last step.
@Pro_Jones_: Wife: Did you do the dishes like I asked? Me: Sorry I was busy W: Doing what? *cat rides by on Roomba wearing gladiator outfit* Me: Uh..
@bad_as_you_want: My boss said , "Dress for the job you want, not the job you have." Now I'm sitting in a disciplinary meeting wearing my wonder woman costume
@MooseAllain: My wife’s written “iron school uniform” on a note. She’s full of bright ideas, but to me this sounds heavy and impractical.