@garrydavenport: The "eye for an eye" philosophy isn't exactly a level playing field if your grievance is with a cyclops.
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@fro_vo: COWORKER RECENTLY OUT OF THE HOSPITAL: i blew a tire on a mountain road and crashed thru the guardrail, rolling end over end down a cliff into a creek. i was trapped for hours upside-down & near death until a man walking his dog found me and called 911 ME: what kind of dog was it
@WrongPandas: [at funeral] Me: "I'm sorry your husband died in that boating accident in Venice" Widow: "please no.... Me: "you have my gondolances"