@TheTweetOfGod: The fact that other bad things are happening is not an argument against fighting a particular bad thing.
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@Pundamentalism: My girlfriend said she wants a fairy-tale life. So I've trapped her in her gran's bedroom with a wolf.
@JosesLovesYou: [at sheep farm] Me: So how do you get steel wool? Farmer: well, that we get from our metal sheep Me: huh? *sheep walks by with Slayer shirt
@WilliamRodgers: My buddy's PRETTY drunk... So I took the car key off of his keychain... He's been trying to start his car with a house key for 4 hours now
@UncleDuke1969: Jim ate my sandwich. It was clearly labeled. Jim's email is open on his PC. Jim's son now thinks he's adopted. The sandwich was LABELED.