@heidi420x: The filling in fortune cookies tastes like paper..
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@WilliamAder: If you get a gift from me, there may or may not be a pair of scissors between the wrapping and the gift. I'm gonna need those back.
@tastefactory: *tree falls in forest, quickly stands up and looks around to see if anybody heard it, brushes self off*
@QwertyJones3: "Doctor, I'm afraid of people yelling letters of the alphabet at me." THERAPIST: Oh! You are? WHY???