@heidi420x: The filling in fortune cookies tastes like paper..
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@Tmoney68: I should have known my son was stealing from his road construction job, but every time I came home I guess I just ignored all the signs.
@abbycohenwl: *pulls motorist over* COP: Are you high? MAN: If I were high would you look like a breathing tree? *one leaf silently falls from cop*
@theroneman: Clyde: I'm looking 4 a partner. What's ur name? "Bonnie" C: That ur real name? "Nope. Jekyll Elizabeth Parker" C: ...Bonnie it is