@NottaBigDeal: The first rule of fight club is to ask her, "Is that what you're wearing?"
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@bergified: Send me your home address and I'll mail you a personal drawing of your favorite animal as long as its a buffalo.
@SpencerLenox: A mattress will double in weight after six years, just like everything else I sleep with!
@aaroncoal: I always keep gluten next to my bed in case a hipster breaks into my house in the middle of the night.