@asimplesean: The first rule of Illiteracy Club is no reading. That was a test, and you failed. You're failing now. You're not welcome in Illiteracy Club.
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@Backthat_sid: Co-worker - Diet coke causes cancer. Me - My grandfather died at 102. CW- He used to drink diet coke? Me - No, he minded his own business.
@Gooooats: My kitten is probably the most playful creature on the planet, but it's less cute when you realize it's all just bird murder practice.
@TheRolo: I tried watching Inception with Twitter on. I still don't know what Juno was doing in their dreams.
@Midgetspar: I get it. True beauty comes from within. But until true beauty can wear lingerie and give a mean lap dance, I may have a few shallow moments