@LocalEmoMom: the gender neutral term for sugar daddy is glucose guardian
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@ilayew: i'm the girl your mom warned you about... long nails, big eyes, purple tongue, green skin. i'm reptar. i'm reptar from rugrats.
@ProdigyNelson: [date] Me: *ok don't let her know I'm a bull* Her: "so what are some red flags for you?" Me: *sweating* "haha red flags? Where?"
@LaziestCanine: Wife: we need to improve our home Me: agreed Wife: remodeling the kitchen should be top priority Me: [crosses out "get more dogs"] obviously