@imchriskelly: The government should pay for everyone to get massages on November 9th.
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@BangMyBongo: Some say Obama is the biggest liar of all time.. I say, the person who chose the spelling of, "Colonel" is the biggest liar of all time
@sock_holliday: When I say books rule you say shhhh Librarian:... Me: BOOKS RULE Librarian: SHHHH! Me: BOOKS RULE Librarian: SHHHH! Me: awwww yeaaaah
@Iwriteforcats: Her: Wanna "lex" tonight? Him: What's that? Her: Lazy sex. Him: What do we do? Her: Lay in bed and send each other Huffington Post articles.