@Sarcasmo718: The guy I just cut off thinks he's gonna destroy my car with high beams.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@juneohara65: Me: "Bless me father, it's been 13,505 days since my last confession." Priest: "You're off to a bad start."
@Kilgore_Studge: I always write "boing" in the memo section of my checks, so all parties involved know how this is gonna go.
@pharmasean: Good thing most planes have TVs. Nothings worse than having to look out the window at Earths sacred majesty from the point of view of angels
@Adar79Angie: There's Angie, and then there's Drunk Angie, and one of us tried to make it to Mexico on an exercise bike.