@Mothpete: The home cooked pizza box says to cook the pizza between 14 and 16 minutes. That's 15 minutes, right? I'm not reading too much into it?
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@Phook75: Whenever my neighbor looks like they want to speak to me. I collapse to the ground motionless as if I were one of Andy's toys.
@PaperWash: People without kids: I'll never yell at my kids People with kids: I DONT KNOW WHY SOMEONE SPIT THEIR GUM ON THE ROAD JUST WALK!
@fro_vo: [spelling bee] Your word is "redacted" can you use it in a sentence? The ██ ████ is █████ ████ and ██ ████.
@bornmiserable: "This race is over," said Donald Trump, referring to the entire human race if he is elected president.