@nthall350: The iPhone 8 probably won't even have a phone in it.
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@oxygenplug: [at party] friend: is dave coming? me: cool dave or dave who likes watering holes & has amnesia? Dave: well, well, well..who do we have here
@dril: ISSUE: is the road runner wile e coyote's son FOR: thhey, seem to respect each other, on some level AGAINST: one of them is a dog
@iwearaonesie: me: Did you brush your teeth? 9: Yes me *hands him a glass of orange juice* 9: Do I have to? me: Yep. Told you not to touch my Cheetos
@CakeThrottle: My coworkers and I do this fun thing where they say 'It's so cold out!' and I say 'It's winter' and then we silently hate each other.