@trevso_electric: The leading method of suicide in Albania is attempting to kidnap Liam Neeson's daughter.
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@Aspersioncast: My "Savings Account" is just several pairs of unwashed jeans on the floor that may or may not still have change in the pockets.
@GinAndJif: If you encounter someone who is massively overreacting to something, calm them down by laughing at them.
@apollilaire: i order a pizza online and under special requests i write: "tell me the meaning of life". when the door bell rings there's only an empty box