@funnyordie: The occupations on 'The Bachelorette' are getting out of hand.
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@GrillinChillin9: Urban Dictionary: Helping white folks figure out if they're getting insulted or complimented daily.
@XplodingUnicorn: 5-year-old: I'll stop asking you to take our family to Disneyland Me: You finally understand we can't afford it 5: You should just send me
@AnkCoupleTO: [5 hours into assembling a new bed for my kid] you'll get used to sleeping on the floor in no time at all