@RealLucasNeff: The ocean isn't shark-infested. It's the ocean. That's where sharks live. We aren't supposed to be there. Humans infest the ocean.
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@hayes_t_r: Chemists do tell jokes, but there's no reaction because all their people skills Argon. Omg, that's Sodium funny, right? Na? Okay.
@HomeProbably: I've received so many Christmas cards from people I don't know this year, probably because they weren't addressed to me.
@thenatewolf: Me: [crouching next to my friend] man, some of these guys take paintball so seriously Log We Are Hiding Behind: freeze
@just1fool: You're supposed to throw rice at new babies and their mothers, right? Traditions are weird.