@RealLucasNeff: The ocean isn't shark-infested. It's the ocean. That's where sharks live. We aren't supposed to be there. Humans infest the ocean.
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@bornmiserable: "Where do escalators come from?" "Well, when an Escalade and an alligator love each other very much..."
@rose24_em: He whispered in my ear that he liked being called daddy. I whispered back that I liked being called a cab.