@DaddyJew: The only problem with teaching little kids to share is that sometimes they want some of my stuff
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@SamGrittner: Every horse you've ever seen has two people inside them. Horses aren't real. Commitment is.
@QwertyJones3: Mankind is capable of unimaginable feats of engineering and yet the windows on the airplane never line up with the seats.
@BavlyOlwy: Whoever lost a bundle of $20 bills tied up in a rubber band..I found the rubber band..