@VirgoSherry: The only thing I want written on my tombstone is "I'm standing right behind you."
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@Okeating: My husband complained that I never do a Sunday roast so I've spent the last hour writing jokes about his bald spot, his skinny legs and the fact that he can't grow a beard.
@juliussharpe: I rented a tuxedo then didn't need it. Do you know how hard it is to sublet a tuxedo?
@TheWoodenslurpy: Marry a man who surrounds himself with good weather and can provide good weather for you and your children.