@TheSnarls: the opposite of a charles manson is a nicole kidman
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@rolldiggity: Bully: "Hey, four eyes!" Me: "Don't you mean... fork eyes?" [Turns around. Stabs bully with forks tied to glasses. Becomes class president.]
@Cpin42: Well Bob, I love to travel, and being my own boss is great. But I suppose my favorite thing about being a serial killer is murdering people.
@okay_andi: Make sure to make eye contact with the hottest person in the room as you stuff a burrito into your mouth
@JayTuvz: I used to play the triangle in a reggae band but left because it was just one ting after another.