@SuperJuanderer: The other giraffes watched and giggled as Herbert got to button number 87 on his dress shirt before they told him he started one button off.
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@KentWGraham: Don’t be fooled by the treadmill in my basement. I got it so I can be in a recliner drinking a beer even when I’m walking the dog.
@DrDogMD: DR DOG: It says you're here for a blood test. First, some questions. Number one: over the last six months who's been a good boy?
@timdonakowski: Why are gifts in airports so expensive? God's punishing you for waiting until the flight home to buy your wife a gift.