@JohnLyonTweets: The premise of The Exorcist is truly terrifying. Imagine having a 12-year-old daughter.
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@stephenjmolloy: Newsreader: "And now Tom with the weather." Weatherman: "It's Tim, actually." Newsreader: "Sorry. And now Tom with the tim."
@LoveNLunchmeat: [reading online survey] Are you ready to double your satisfaction? My god this sounds wildly inappropriate. *clicks yes*
@junejuly12: BREAKING NEWS Literally to be eliminated from the English language in 2015 Use it while you can, white girls