@JohnLyonTweets: The premise of The Exorcist is truly terrifying. Imagine having a 12-year-old daughter.
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@MarlonBrandNO: [Date] (don't let her know you're an alien larva) Her: I wonder where he is? *I burst through her chest* Me: Did you order yet? I'm starved
@WilliamAder: Whoever gets the gift from me that has scissors under the wrapping paper, I'm going to need those back.
@TheAlexNevil: Police Sketch Artist: How about now? Me: Look I already told you, the fruit bowl is nice for perspective, but I wasn't mugged by a naked guy