@daemonic3: The real reason the Mayan civilization collapsed is they never updated their Adobe.
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@iwearaonesie: friend: Try this me[takes drink] It's wine friend: Did you detect a hint of anything? me:Alcohol friend: But what did it taste like? me:Wine
@HallpassCanada: Just saw a really hot woman in 9inch heels pay for a plasma tv with ones.. I could be wrong but i think she might be a librarian.
@TweetPotato314: Waiter: and would you like mayonnaise on that? Wife: Ew, gross. Me: Why are you making your sex noises at him?
@PaperWash: before cameras, people would have to say "cheese" for two hours while they got their portrait painted