@WilliamRodgers: The rest of you just need to get fat because I don't feel like going to the gym anymore...
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@BriarSlyMadness: If you're ever attacked by a mob of angry Vegans... ...don't worry about it. They're too weak to hurt you.
@myonlymizztake: I work for the government which means I have to enter 2 passwords in order to print documents that are open to the public.
@StarWarsProblms: Kylo Ren: We must find Luke Skywalker General Hux: Why? He won't fight & you don't need training. Kylo: He might have cool Vader souvenirs
@Twtercide: 911: What is your emergency? Me: Fire 911: Riley, is that you? Me:.... 911: Listen carefully, that firefighter asked to be transferred.