@dorkwing_duck: The scene where Indiana Jones swaps the bags and runs from a boulder but it's me trying to eat a cookie without my kid seeing me
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@thinkingparsnip: *DJ drops the beet* ERRYBODY IN THE CLUB begins wondering why the DJ would bring a root vegetable to work with him.
@TommyWallace: Dr: I was going to ask if you were sexually active but- Me [wearing hot dog costume]: but what
@huntigula: [1st date] Her: so u play piano? Him: yep Her: is it hard? Him: that's pretty forward but yeah, as a rock Her: I meant playing piano Him: oh