@DownFrontArtist: The secret to success is to surround yourself with people that don't know you.
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@RightOJack: My GF spent $49 on a haircut. Had she gone to Petsmart she'd have gotten an ear cleaning, anal gland extraction and a free bandana as well.
@Breadery: Brain: Walk up to her and offer her a drink. Me: I WANT TO DRINK YOU LIKE A SIPPY CUP. Brain: Can you actually hear me?
@Go2Slp: What flavor is the milkshake? How far away is the yard? How could you know its better than mine? You seem, frankly, a bit overconfident.
@Freudstombstone: It hurts my feelings when people call me a failure. I'd rather people think of me as successfully challenged.