@ShawnHatosy: The so called genius at the Apple Store mentioned he has a girlfriend; thus, his geek credibility is compromised & I don't trust his advice.
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@OfficeofSteve: When I die and doctors perform an autopsy, they'll probably find twenty pounds of stickers off of fruit in my intestines
@p_net: Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: No idea. I pretty much just zone out whenever I'm behind the wheel. Did anyone die?
@24HourBitching: Having to share a room with your spouse is absolute nonsense. Even kids get their own rooms...