@wesjohnson8: The trouble with lawyer jokes is that lawyers don't think they're funny, & nobody else thinks they're jokes.
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@thenamesmikeG: The weirdest thing just happened. I had Cancer, then 15 people on Facebook were brave enough to change their statuses, & now I'm cured.
@abhorrent_wife: I just apologized for sending someone a text using shouty font because I couldn't remember the term "all caps".
@lisaxy424: 4th grade student: How old are you? Me: Quite a bit older than you. Student: So like 23? Me: Deal. Tell all your friends.