@jlock17: The Twelve Days of Christmas would cost$107,000 this year which is relatively cheap considering the amount of human trafficking in the song.
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@david8hughes: Cop: we know you're in there. Me in a French accent: I am not ere, I am in France. Cop: when will you be back? Me: je ne comprends pas
@dongfuture: Telepathy “Huh?” Telepathy “Ok…let’s move on. What—” Telepathy “Please stop interrupting! What are your strengths?” *rolls eyes* Telepathy
@sixfootcandy: (Breaks car window to save a dog) Guy: I'm in the car! Me: Yeah but it's hot Him: The AC is on! Me: Can I get in? It's really hot out here.
@Rick_IZ: People who lick their fingers then page through the papers on the printer Just throw it out. I'll print it again.