@dollarslices: the worst part of the robot uprising will be the constant software updates
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@EndhooS: I invited Alan over for dinner. "Alan Jacobs? Or Alan who thinks he's Captain America?" *a badly painted bin lid smashes through the window*
@BruceForce: Thought it would be romantic to serenade this girl with some Elvis. I swear that's the last time I sing "You ain't nothin but a hound dog"
@TheAlexNevil: I don't trust a restaurant that advertises "Now with more bacon!" because it means they were holding out on me to begin with.