@trevso_electric: The worst thing that can happen when you invite someone over to "watch a movie" is actually watching a movie.
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@djderk: Suicide terrorists: jokes on you! Virgins totally suck. Have fun jerking off while she cries.
@ibid78: Keep your friends close but your enemies closer. No closer. Become one with your enemy. You're now your own worst enemy. Don't freak out.
@KalvinMacleod: HER: my dad hates puns but loves food ME: got it HER: dad, this my date ME: hey papaya yam glad to meat u HIM: *shakes then crushes my hand*