@BadaBinge: There are 7 trillion nerves in the human body and some people manage to get on every one.
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@withanewname: [breaking up with girlfriend via the jumbotron] "Hey, check out the scoreboard while I grab a hot dog."
@CulturedRuffian: Chef 1: You can't serve cake for breakfast, moms won't allow it. Chef 2: What if we fry it in a pan & pour syrup all over it? 1: GENIUS!
@0hJuliette: I'm bored, think I'll go to the mall, find a great parking spot, sit in my car with my reverse lights on