@rickkondell: There is a piece of aluminum foil blowing across the road and all I can think is that one of you is without your protective headgear today.
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@MatCro: [battle] ME: It's no good. We gotta quit SARGE: Quit? I don't know the meaning of the word M: It means give up S: Oh cool. Lets do that
@dubstep4dads: [first date] her: so, tell me about yourself! me: well, im not good with dates her: but you're doing fine! me: christmas is on september 3rd
@hadafewbeers: Love it when moms refer to kids by age in tweets. "6 fell down today". Wonder if the kids do the opposite at school: "33 is drunk again".