@philco816: There is no way Hollywood could remake Scream for millennials because, none of them would answer the phone.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Robert_Beau: You know you're getting old when your decision to sleep with someone is mostly based on the quality of their mattress and pillows.
@KeetPotato: wife: "this is really your idea of an anniversary present?" me: [on the other walkie talkie] "you didn't say over, over"
@OkieGirl405: I changed my relationship status to "I'm sharpening my knives" on Facebook so my boyfriend's family will never come visit
@AmericanGent69: Me: Excuse me Father, what's the Wifi password? Priest: We're in Church! Me: Oh I'm sorry. What's the Wifi password, Amen.