@jazmasta: There must be an easier way to transport long poles across canyons other than walking across a tightrope carrying one pole at a time.
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@QwertyJones3: But my sandwich is so dry! "Sorry sir, that's not what we do here at the Mayo Clinic."
@Brentweets: Women are like squirrels, very cute from a distance but will fight when you try to pick them up and get them in your car.
@SammySkinns: Recent studies show that eating bacon or other red meats increases your chances of dying by 20% So apparently I have a 120% chance of dying