@NYC_Blonde: There should be an option on travel websites that let's you search for "flights that are least likely to have noisy children".
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@lloydrang: Will I. Am's headstone will read "Will I. Was," completing history's longest set-up to a punchline
@JediGigi: Mom asked me what it's like being a single middle aged woman so I took a handful of cat & dog hair from my purse and threw it in her coffee.
@ToxicProbably: Jeez make one joke about putting cyanide in someone's food and suddenly they don't want you to cook for them anymore