@Humor_Fetish: There's a fine line between flirty and creepy. And that line is called being good looking.
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@MUMSIEesq: Give them a Cheesecake Factory gift card this holiday season so they know you "grocery store checkout line" love them
@LeeMifsud: "I saw a flock of cows today" "Flock of cows?" "Yes a flock of cows" "Herd of cows?" "Of course I've heard of cows, I saw a flock of them!"
@sixfootcandy: Me: The dog gives me more kisses because he loves me the most. Him: No, it's because you never wipe the ice cream off your chin.