@sidneelyn: there's no attractive way to chase a ping pong ball
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@AkashThakan: Let me tell you why going outside is not safe. Because chances are after a few days you end up retweeting a joke about yourself.
@imteddybless: when i tell guys i want a baby i just assume they kno i don't mean a human one. i want a baby antelope, a baby hedgehog, a baby lizard
@HomeProbably: My son wants a new iPhone for Christmas and I'm having fond memories of when he couldn't talk.