@Steelers1972: There's no easy way to steal a watermelon.
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@bornmiserable: [United] This is your captain speaking. Underneath each of your seats is a broadsword. In the words of Highlander, there can be only one.
@Tmoney68: I've been trying to figure out why I overslept today. Just realized drunk me set my calculator for $7.30.
@NurseMurderer: I'm in that fun part of a relationship where everything is new and exciting and we are learning things about each other and I don't poop.