@o__0Dev: There’s no logical reason for shorts to be the same price as pants.
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@murrman5: [while listening to halloween sounds cd I bought] spooky huh [friend on road trip with me] yeah but got anythin else its like a 6 hour drive
@Beerhaze: Having a wife and daughters, I try bottles in the shower until I find one that doesn't burn my balls and wash myself all over with that one.
@MelvinofYork: Me: Just so you know, I’m DTF right now. Wife: I don’t know what "DTF" means. Me: Take a guess. Wife: (pause) Definitely Too Fat?
@PaperWash: Remember kids, those light up sneakers won't seem so cool when wolves are chasing you through the woods at night.