@bigmacher: They say 'No news is good news,' but I think it just means I have a lazy paperboy.
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@MicheleAKALips: When life hands you 3 kids..... You add the lemons to some vodka and hide in the closet.
@mommy_cusses: Being a mom means saying things that shouldn't be threatening in a very threatening manner. Like, "EAT YOUR CEREAL!" for example.
@Douchekevin: At church they said the number of the beast is 666, but I stood up and said that's not my wifes phone number at all. She's zero fun today