@bigmacher: They say 'No news is good news,' but I think it just means I have a lazy paperboy.
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@mdob11: A high-pressure hose will usually stop a coworker from showing you any more baby photos.
@Dawn_M_: Just once I'd like the guy hired to kill me to complete the job and not fall in love with me.
@ParkerTheKing: I will do a lot of things but admiting I'm cold to my mom when she told me to bring a jacket is not one.
@TheTweetOfGod: I've said it before and I'll say it again: the Bible is 100% accurate. Especially when thrown at close range.