@TheCatWhisprer: They say you shouldn't eat right before bed so now I just wait until I'm in bed.
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@CarelWillemse: Uber driver: "I'm close, where are you?" Me: "oh I see you" Uber Driver: "Are you the guy in the middle of the road?" Me: "yeah floor it"
@LostFelicia: People that use abbreviations like ppl, wyd, hmu, and idk - what do you do with all that time you saved?